Part 1

I'm trying really hard to focus on the score in front of me, but I can't, because Toshiya and Kyo's voices are all yapping around me and Shinya is playing with his dog but not quietly!
Kaoru, the only one sits in the corner of the room quietly and is checking Toshiya's composition.
Why Kaoru have to do that?? Is because every time they finished composing a song, they'll just check it once by themself and then they leave it to Kaoru.
You might ask, what about Kyo?! Well, Me and Kaoru are the only 2 people that can read his writing, somehow we need to fix the errors for him, too.

Kaoru suddenly snaps really hard on the table, taking the scores and Kyo's lyrics with him, walking right in the middle of the room. The whole room went silent.
"Just why can't you guys stop playing around?!!!!!" Kaoru suddenly yells.
"15 mins break!" Kaoru walks out of the room and slams the door behind him.
".............some...something wrong??" Kyo asks.
"Umm.....I think so....." Toshiya answers.

Yoshiki walks in. "Hey, you guys!"
Toshiya jumps to Yoshiki. "Yoshiki-San! Kaoru is mad."
"Kaoru mad?!!!!!! Are you sure?!!!"
"Yes!!!! He just yelled at us and slammed the door!!!"
"Kaoru got mad......this is the end of the world!!!! Hahahahahaah!!!"

Then I walk out from the band room and see what had happen to Kaoru, and I found that he is in the bathroom, facing the mirror...
"Kaoru?"
"Aa..." Still looking at the mirror.
"Are you alright?"
"Yeah, I am fine..."
"But your face is ...so white ...are you sure?"
"Yes!! I said I am fine!!! OK?!!!!"
"Kaoru, I don't think so, you never yell at us and never get this mad before. What had happen?? Are you sick?" I walk closer.
"No! I am ok!" He looks at me and I found out he looks really pale, I then put my hand on his forehead but he moves away.
"Kaoru, how about I take you to doctor and have a check?" I try to be nice.
He shakes his head.
"OK then."
So we both walk back to the bandroom, but on our way back to to the bandroom, Kaoru's walking path already looks weird...before he opens the door of the bandroom, his whole body falls back so I quickly catch him at the back.
"Kaoru!!! Kaoru!!!"
Toshiya open the door. "What...What had happened?!!!"
"He fainted!!!"

*************************
In hospital

"He has to really take more rest, he's been too busy and his body just can't handle it." The doctor said.
"He needs to stay in hospital?" I ask.
"At least for few hours for checking, if he is fine, he can go home then. But please look after him."
"Yes yes! I will."
"So here is the medicine that he needs to take, 2 per 4 hours. After you take him home, please change him into some relaxing clothes." The doctor hands me the medicine.

*************************
My Home

I am trying to cook some food for Kaoru, but what should I cook?! And what can I cook?! I only have cup noodles and beers!!
"Die-Kun........." The weak voice comes from my bed room, Kaoru?
I then run to my room to see what happened, Kaoru is still lying on the bed, but he seems so sick.
"Kaoru? You alright?" I am so worried.
"water.....I want water..." Kaoru still has his eyes close.
"Ok, wait."
When I let him drink the glass of water, he spits the water out. "hurts......" He whisper.
"Here, try to drink little by little..." I carefully hold up the glass of water again near to his lips, but then he still feels his throt hurting. So I let him lay back down again.
"Die-Kun....." He whisper while I almost walk out from the room.
I quickly walk back beside him. "Yes?"
"Drive me home...." He grips my hand lightly.
"No, Kaoru, tomorrow! I must let you go home tomorrow, ok?" I say softly.
"Please........I still have 2 songs to check........." He shakes my hand lightly.
"I'll check for you." I put his hand back under the blanket.
"but...."
"Don't make me mad, Kaoru." I warn him.
He then covers all over himself so tight with the blanket.
"Kaoru!"
Didn't answer.
"I've just brought one of Hide-San's music video, oh well, i don't think you want it now." I tease him.
And he slowly moves the cover down so I could only see his eyes.
"Really?"
"Really what?"
"Video........."
"If you want that video, sleep now, then after you wake up we'll watch it together, ok?"
Kaoru nodded. Then he fell back to sleep again.
And my cell phone rang, since I don't want to wake up Kaoru, therefore, I already decreased the volume of the ringing tone.
"Hai." I answer the phone.
"Aa, Where are you guys now?" It’s Kyo.
"We are at my home now, Kaoru just went back to sleep." I take some money with me and I walk to the super store.
"How's he?"
"The doctor said he is just too tired, so need to take more rest and I am in super store now."
I walk into the soup section in the super store, trying to look for a kind of soup that Kaoru likes.
"Die, can I talk to you for a moment?" The phone passed to Shinya.
"Go head." I am reading the name of the soup.
"You are the one who understand Kaoru the most, can you tell us what's wrong with him?"
"I am not really sure, too. I think he is just too tired, so he acts weird." I take few cans of soup to the counter.
"Didn't you feel that Kaoru...umm....really trusts you?"
"Aa..."
"Die, I will be there in 15 minutes, so wait for me in the coffee shop beside the super store." Sounds like an order to me, but I want to know his ideas, too. Since, Shinya is the one who see things really clear other then Kaoru...

15 Mins Later

I've brought a magazine to read and here Shinya comes.
"Hey, over here."
"So, Kaoru...."
"He is still sleeping, hopefully." I said.
"Oh...................you can feel it, can’t you?"
"Feel what?"
"Kaoru, I mean, can't you feel that he acts so weird these days? Especially when you are near by."
"Shinya, just say out what you want to say, I still have to cook soup for Kaoru." I feel like Shinya is a bit annoying. I’ve never felt like this before.
"Kaoru likes you."
"Aa......" I’m still looking at the cover of the magazine which Kaoru is on. I then suddenly get surprised of what Shinya had just said. "What?!"
"He likes you! Can't you feel it?!"
"Well..........It’s only friendship.....he likes all of us anyways."
"You know I don't mean this."
"Ok, that's it! I am going to go back up now." I stand up.
"Die, just face the truth."
"I did! Kaoru is the one who can't face it!"
"................"
"I'll ask him later, and he will stay at my home for tonight."
"Ask him later?!!!"
"Ask him what had happen to him, altho I've asked before."

************************
6pm

I know the TV is on, and the show now is Smap x Smap, but I can't hear anything, all I do is sit there looking at the TV, looking at these people cooking...How to ask Kaoru about that?
And then...
"Die-Kun." Kaoru's voice suddenly appears beside me.
"Oh! Kaoru?! When did you woke up?!"
"I've stood here for 5 mins already, just you didn't reliaze." He smiles and sits beside me. "I've never known you like to watch Smap."
"Aa...I can't believe this either."
"Huh?"
"Nothing." I smile, I truly don't know what I am talking about!
"So, Die-Kun, where are my clothes?"
After he asked, I then remembered that he is wearing my clothes. I look at him, my clothes are too large for him, it seems like he is small and weak.
"They’re in the washing store..." I just can't keep my eyes off him.
"Oh.............hey! Didn't you say you've got a video of Hide-San?!" He smiles.
"Yes! Want to watch it now?" I stand up and walk to the VCR.
"Of course!! But....Die-Kun..."
I turn around and look at him. "Yes?"
"I am hungry........"
"Oh!!! I've cooked some soup, I’ll go heat it now, wait." I quickly walk to the kichen.

************************
Few Mins After

"Yummy!" Kaoru finished his soup.
"So....I have some question to ask you."
"What is it? You sound so serious." He laughs a little.
"Yes, I am serious, so tell me! What had happen to you these past few days." I look at him.
"Nothing happened."
"You think you can lie to me?"
"..........."
"Tell me."
"I............."
I move closer and hug Kaoru tightly. "I knew it already, I knew it!!! So please release yourself!!"
"Die-Kun........what...what do you know..?"
"You like me, don't you?"
".............."
"You don't just want to be my firend, do you?"
"................."
"Why don’t you ask me? Why don’t you tell me?"
"....because I am afraid of the answer!" Kaoru finally speaks.
"You didn't even ask!!!"
"So........you.....umm....do you......umm.......do you like me?"
"Yes!! Yes!!! Really really like you!!!"
"..really?!"
"Why would I lie to you?!"
"But........but......"
"You don't trust me?"
"Nono! I always trust you! I just can't........"
"Can't face yourself, right?"
".........I also can't ........I am a guy, too."
"You think I don't know?!" I laugh while I playing with his long hair at the back.
"I........you will regret it later!"
I pull myself from him and look at him into his eyes."Look at me, Kaoru! I love you."
"......I............I......." He looks really surprised and he blushes...
"Kaoru, please let me take care of you..." I hug him again.
He didn't answer for a long time and just shyly put his arms around me, too.
"Am I dreaming??" Kaoru ask.
"No, you're not. It’s real, everything is real..."
"I've never thought that I could hug you like this, I've never thought that you will like me..." Tears start to roll down from his eyes.
I brush his tears away for him. "Don't cry....it's ok..."
"Why has my weak side shown infront of you?!" He gets mad at himself.
"Because you trust me, Kaoru." He cries on my chest.
"..............I can't win you......"
"Win me? For what?!"
"I always thought that if I can't be stronger than other members, then I can't take care of them...but I knew I can't win you, because you are stronger than I am...you.....you just can see through me!"
"Awwww!! But I want to see through your clothes, too!!" I make joke.
But seems like Kaoru can't take it. *SLAP*
I look at him and give him a big big smile! "Want to sleep with me?~!" Then I carry him in my arms and take him to my room.
We chatted and giggled for about 3 hrs, Kaoru and I fell asleep, too. This is the first time I’ve slept with someone on the same bed but didn't have sex! Somehow I kind of regret I didn't, but oh well.
*********************
The Next Morning

Me and Kaoru are woke by the ringing of the door bell, so I put on my pants and see who it is.
But after I open the door, I see a really really familiar face. "OHAYO~~~~~~~~~~~~~~!!!!!!"
"Na-Chan!!!! What are you doing here?!"
"I miss you le!! You haven't come to my home for a week already!!" She then puts her arms around my neck.
I push her away. "We are game over! OK?"
"Game Over......will this be a game over if I have some conversation with your....KA-O-RU?!" She looks behind me and that makes me follow, Kaoru stands behind us with my big t-shirt on.
"Die-Kun.....she is..?"
"Kaoru....oh! I...she is...my cousin!!" What a stupid lie!!
"HEY!!!!!!!! Who is your cousin?!!!!!" She yells. She then tells Kaoru. "I am Die's sex partner! Nice to meet you!" She gives out her hand.
Kaoru is sooooo confused now, all he does is look at Die.
Na-Chan then says again. "You don't know what a sex partner is, do you?" She saw Kaoru didn't reply, so she keeps on going. "Sex partner...umm....is just like those one night stands." She smiles, she doesn't even know the relationship between Kaoru and Die.
After a while of silence, Kaoru walks into the bed room, gets his clothes back on.
"Where are you going, Kaoru?" I ask.
"To the studio." Kaoru replies in a really really cool voice.
"Kaoru, listen to me...I........I......."
"Bye!" He slams the door close.
I then turn around to Na-Chan. "WE ARE GAME OVER! NOW FUCK OFF!"
Then I go out and run after Kaoru.
But he had already disppeared in the street.
**********************
Later in that day.

I didn't go back to studio, since.....I don't know how to face Kaoru....well, that girl, yes! She was my partner before, but that's BEFORE!!!
After the whole day's thinking, I decide to go to the studio tomorrow and explain it to Kaoru.

********************
Next Day At Night

Toshiya and Kyo came up with an idea to go to the bar and have some fun, I am really surprised that Kaoru also goes! Of couse I follow them.
Although Kaoru is in the bar, too. But he doesn’t play with Toshiya and Kyo, he just sits by himself and drinks.
So I walk close to him. "Kaoru...don't drink anymore..."
He didn't speak.
"Kaoru, I can explain that!"
Still he keeps in silent.
"Kaoru, please~~~"
He then stand up and walks to Toshiya and Kyo. "Hey! You guys, can I join?"
"Sure!" Toshiya answer. "We are playing cards here, Die-Kun. Want to join?"
"No." I answer. "Kaoru, can I talk with you for a min?" I try to calm myself down.
But he doesn’t even look at me, then they start to play.
And about 2 hrs later, Kaoru was drunk. Because what they are playing is lose one game, drink 2 cups of Sake, and Sake is Kaoru's weakness.
"Kaoru, let me take you home." I try to make him stand.
"NO!!!!!!" He fights back.
"Kaoru! You are drunk!"
"NO!!!! I am not!!!!"
"Come on." I try to drag him out. But suddenly he stops all his movement.
"Kaoru??"
He then turns back and put his face on my chest. "Die-Kun!!" He also puts his arms around my wrist too.
(Kaoru at that time is sitting and Die is standing behind him.)
"I like you!!! Die-Kun!!!! I really really really really like you!!!" He hugs me tighter.
Lucky that Toshiya and Kyo also were drunk, so they don't really take this seriously but just point at Kaoru and laugh at him. "Hahahahahhahahaa!!! Kaoru is such a BAAAABY!!"
And therefore, it’s better for me to take him home. But he keep saying that he doesn't want to go home in my car, so I just take him to my home, again.
*******************************
My Home

Once Kaoru gets into my house, he throws up.
"OH!!! Kaoru, are you alright??" I am so worried.
"I don't need your help!!" Words are not clear from his drunk voice.
"Kaoru...listen to me..."
"No!!!! You liar!!! I hate you!!!! Go Away!!!!" He said with a laughing voice, and he runs around in my house like a kid.
"Kaoru!!" I try to catch him, I’ve never ever seen him like this before.
He then suddenly sits on the floor and close his eyes. "Die-Kun! I want water!"
So I quickly get him a cup of water. But....*Splash~~~*
"Kaoru?!!!!" I took of my top shirt since is all wet now.
"WAaaaaahahahahahhahahahahahahaha!!!! Stupid Die-Kun!!!" He points at me.
"Kaoru, don't play anymore, lets go to take a shower."
"A SHOWER?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" He yell. "WITH YOU?!!!!!!!!!!!!" He then suddenly hug me, and that was too sudden that make me fall back, with Kaoru sitting on my stomach.
"Shower shower~~~!" He tries to take off my pants.
"KAORU?!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"
"Shower shower~~!!!" He didn't reply to me, but then he takes off his own shirt.
"WA.......KA...KAORU!!!" I try to stop him, but it was too late.
He then tries really hard to stand up, also trying to pull me up too.
"URRRRR!!!!"
"Kaoru, what do you want now?" I ask.
"Shower!!"
So I stand up on my own and he holds my hands and pulls me to bathroom with him.
But he suddenly stops, turns around, and kisses me!
"I'll give you, whatever you want..."
"Kaoru, you are drunk..."
"Maybe I am drunk now, but I am so sure what I am talking about here...."
"Kaoru....that girl, yes, she was my sex partner, but that was before!!! Right now and in future, I only love you..." I hug him so tight.
"Really??" He asks.
"Really!! Please trust me." I can feel Kaoru's arms around my waist really tight.

**************************
Part 1 end

Unfinished...
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